WTF: Part II, Los Ticos

This World Cup is barely three days old and it’s already got me questioning life, the universe… all that sort of thing. Netherlands beating Spain is not altogether surprising; Netherlands beating Spain by a score of 5-1 is. 

COSTA RICA 3, URUGUAY 1

But what Costa Rica did yesterday counts as a HUGE upset. So is Uruguay overrated, or are Los Ticos underrated? I wonder how many times Uruguayans can say “WTF?!?” before the 3-1 loss sinks in as reality. Shocking, simply shocking.

'You put your right foot here and you SHAKE IT ALL ABOUT...'

COLOMBIA 3, GREECE 0

In other news, Colombia did the expected in a closely contested match with Greece. An early goal at the 6-minute mark caught the Greeks off-guard and they never fully recovered. Up 2-0 heading into stoppage time, Los Cafeteros added a third marker with barely a minute remaining, making the final score a well-deserved 3-0 for Colombia. 

'You do the HOKEY-POKEY and you turn yourself around...'

Aside from being an entertaining match, there were fewer shenanigans overall as the officials let the players dictate the result; something this tournament could use more of.

ITALY 2, ENGLAND 1

England and Italy played a close one yesterday as well. The ‘Rumble in the Jungle’ saw Italy take a 1-0 lead before Wayne Rooney (hair plugs and all) assisted on a beauty by Sturridge to tie it up. But it was not to be for the English, as Mario Balotelli once again became a difference maker by putting the Italians ahead with one off his noggin (see what I did there?) early in the second half. England would go on to dominate the match late but ultimately fail to find the equaliser. 

'THAT'S what it's all ABOUT!'

Pitch conditions were said to be terrible, with the vocal Italian manager Cesare Prandelli quoted as saying the following (translated from Italian): “If you want to give the players a chance to perform, you have to put them in a situation where they can do that. The conditions were absurd.” And his is the team that WON.

  

IVORY COAST 2, JAPAN 1

Les Elephants trampled the Blue Samurai, picking up much needed momentum when Didier Drogba was subbed in during the second half. Shortly after the sub, Ivory Coast took the lead with two headers just 98 seconds apart by Wilfried Bony and Gervinho. The Japanese were stunned, and having sat back after taking the early lead, could muster little resistance the rest of the way.

'I GOT your HOKEY-POKEY... right HERE!'

HIGHFALUTIN PICKS OF THE DAY:

SWITZERLAND 1, ECUADOR 0

FRANCE 1, HONDURAS 1

ARGENTINA 2, BOSNIA/HERZEGOVINA 0

Standings will be posted Monday night. Stay tuned!